Day Sixteen – London

So, I made it out to the Carnival with some pretty high expectations. I mean I should expect that when the tube is PACKED and the po po are everywhere.  The interesting thing here is that, with all the police around, the crowd was really great. There was a lax open container law all day and there was a Tesco at the entrance of the festival that everyone was grabbing beer at and carrying with them to the party.

I found the parade. I expected this:

I saw a long line of large 18 wheeler trunks with BIG ASS speakers in the back and people dancing to the same music with no costumes in site! I was so disappointed. So, I hunted down the face painting peeps and got the right side of my face painted blue with white starbursts and 1 American star on the side. Have to give a shout out to the motherland.

Anyway, let me tell you about the toilets. There were three options.

1. The public toilet. It was free and everyone got a cheer who came out when they were down. It was also the most disgusting thing I have ever been around. All I’ll say is this, it was too gross to even pop a squat.

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2. The port-to-pottys. Very nice.  A LOT of TP and they even had a mirror and napkins to wash your hands. Unfortunately, they were ill placed around the event and that left me with option 3.

3. Private residence. Many people were offing their toilet for £1. Fine with me. There were three girls in front of me dripping with dried chocolate and then another girl attempted to jump the queue, and stand in front of me. I managed to get in front of her, she screamed, “Don’t fuck with me, I’ll piss in your face.” She then fell into the wall. As we got closer to the bathrooms, she jumped the queue from behind me to the front. I yelled to the owners of the house that she was jumping the queue and the conversation between them was interesting. The owners were calm and polite, the girl? Belligerent and insistent that she go next.

I then blurted out:

“This is there house, technically you’re trespassing. If they want you to leave they can go get the police and have them escort you out.”

She finally did leave and I found out the owners were allowing the men to piss in the backyard in a bucket, that was attached to a hose.

Nice.

Other interesting things from the festival:

Price Gauging of the beer at the pubs.

Vendors refusal to give me  1 (ONE)  napkin for my hands unless I bought something from them.

People here continue to bump into you without apology, unless it’s a civil servant

I do feel like the children I have seen here are treated differently, more independently and more attention than in Philly.

Later in the night we headed to the Westbury in Kilburn to see Spinderella.  Once we were in, the bar ran out of ALL their beer and could only offer Fosters….then I found out Spinderella had to cancel the show because she didn’t have a work permit for London and then sent her back the US on the next plane out.

Here’s to my fav fem DJ:

We quickly got a refund and headed to the next bar…which had…can you guess?

KARAOKE!!!! It was brilliant.

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